Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
my mom just threw water on me to get me awake and is screaming "where is my fucking car?!"
you gave me a ride last nite what the hell did you do with it after you left me?
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
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