is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I puked a lego.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
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