the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
Randomize