Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
Khloé Kardashian Finally Speaks Out About The Tristan Thompson Cheating Scandal
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
Impromptu road trip to New Orleans for four days of Mardi Gras. I'll probably be alive and back for Valentine's Day plans, probably won't stick my dick in some random either-might be using my free pass you cheating asshat. Love you. Expect random texts & probably a drunk dial or twelve. You did this to yourself. You're not invited so don't bother. Have fun at work.
15 Porn Memes You’re Only Allowed To Laugh At If You’re Over 18
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
Randomize
