On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
I'm paying a homeless guy $20 to follow me around bars tonight with a boombox playing the theme to Rocky.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone