David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
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