Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
I can feel your judgement through the phone
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
