Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
Randomize
