Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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