Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
Randomize