Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
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