I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
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