If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
Randomize
