He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
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