i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I just broke up with Liz. I feel awful so I put two free rentals on her Blockbuster account.
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
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