Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
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