I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
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