He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
