I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
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