I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
you inspire me to be a worse person
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
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