I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
Randomize
