: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Randomize
