don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
Randomize
