you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
Randomize
