I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
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