I was to big spoon the shit out of you right now
I'm so hungover and dru,k
I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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