im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
my sisters under your porch take her home
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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