What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
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