Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
Randomize