wrigley field is MILF paradise
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just sent this text using only my big toe
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize