There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Randomize
