Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
Randomize
