I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
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