Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
ugly people sure do ruin things
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Randomize
