Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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