Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
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