matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Randomize
