I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
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