FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Randomize
