is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize