Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups