dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
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