Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
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