I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
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