i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
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They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
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If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
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