I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
Randomize