oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize