One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
