how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
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