Those balls look pretty dangerous.
He called me "the Joe Montana of blowies." Not sure if that is an accomplishment or an insult, but going off of the amount of condensation on the windows of my car, I'm gonna just do a little touchdown dance and pass out.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
is that a dick in a sweater?
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
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