Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
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