how hairy? two words: wookie tits
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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