This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
